Scorpio man seeks woman who can keep a secret, stay faithful. Must have high sex drive, and must never ever look at another man (or woman, for that matter). Extra points if you have a healthy respect for privacy. Willingness to merge assets a plus — bringing along debts may be a dealbreaker. You should have completed a full round of psychoanalysis first, and know your dark side well — I don’t want to be your therapist, and I’d rather you have thoroughly examined yourself before I dig up all your skeletons. Tolerance for witnessing emotional extremes and black moods is a necessity. If you want to be possessed, I’m your man.